Ultimates 2 #9

Issue Date: 
January 2006
Story Title: 
Grand Theft America
Staff: 

Mark Millar (writer), Bryan Hitch (pencils), Paul Neary & Bryan Hitch (inks), Laura Martin (colors), Chris Eliopoulos (letters), Omar Otieku (production), Nicole Wiley & John Barber (assistant editors), Ralph Macchio (editor), Joe Quesada (editor-in-chief), Dan Buckley (publisher)

SPECIAL THANKS TO: Joe Simon & Jack Kirby (creators of Captain America)

Brief Description: 

Hawkeye is still alive! However, he is imprisoned and strapped on an operating table in an unknown location. A scientist held him doped up for three days so he and his partners could rip out all of the security codes and classified information they needed out of Clint’s head. He also confirms to Clint that both his wife and kids are really dead. Meanwhile, at Iron Man’s townhouse, Tony tells Jarvis to prepare breakfast for him and Natasha. Natasha seems to feel upset and Tony thinks she wants to postpone the wedding because of the Hawkeye case, which is understandable. He goes back to Natasha in their bedroom and wants to talk about it, but she doesn’t and instead wants to make love. At the Triskelion, Nick Fury holds a meeting with the remaining members of the Ultimates and the Reserves. During the discussions about what happened to Captain America, the lights and security shields are turned off. The entire Triskelion falls apart and America is under attack! Luckily, Wanda manages to rescue everyone with a teleportation spell. Pietro rushes into the city to help the citizens out, but gets hit by one of the new, mysterious foes. Wanda loses contact with him and fears they’ve lost Pietro, however Fury helps Wanda to keep it together. She tries to protect their team from harm, but their attackers number in the hundreds and she just can’t do it. She collapses and the attackers take down Fury, Betty and the Reserves. Their leader, Loki, triumphs at their victory and is glad that he, as Lord of Mischief, could start World War Three. While his team apprehends both the Fantastic Four and the X-Men as well, Loki wants to contact Hank Pym to help lock them up. Meanwhile, Natasha reveals her true colors and shoots Jarvis! She isn’t ready just yet, and holds her gun against Tony’s head as well.

Full Summary: 

In a lab at an unknown location…

A scientist holding a scalpel ready says hello to his prisoner: Hawkeye! He asks Clint if he’s feeling drowsy and explains that’s because Clint has just spend the last three days doped up on sodium thiopental while they ripped a bunch of state secrets from his head. The scientist touches Clint’s head, gloating that surely he didn’t think they’d execute a high-ranking SHIELD officer with all that classified information in him: those were tranquilizers. But his children did swallow bullets and that fat wife of his as well, though the scientist can’t remember Clint’s wife’s name… was it Lana or Laura? But that doesn’t matter now.

Clint tries to free himself but the chains on the operating table he’s strapped on are too powerful. His anger at the scientist is clear, though can’t seem to say anything. The scientist bets if there were a knife or a gun or a safety pin lying around, he’d be dead already. But there isn’t any. And there’s nothing less frightening than the best shot in the world with nothing in his hands. A shadowed man enters the scientist room, wanting to say something, but the doc asks for two more minutes. The scientist mocks Hawkeye – he can’t believe the hero never saw this coming. He can’t believe he never guessed what they were after, after Banner and Thor and even poor old Cap got set up by the team’s traitor. He means, think about it… who profits most from disabling the Ultimates?

The scientist put his glasses back on, telling Hawkeye that America’s enemies have been organizing something huge and, thanks to him, they’ve now got all the security codes they need. Clint starts to cry.

Tony Stark’s townhouse…

Jarvis takes a drink and goes to sit on a chair, where he reads his newspaper. He asks Tony how their little Black Widow is doing this morning. Tony, taking two bottles of wine, smiles to Jarvis she’s as well as can be expected. And he’d appreciate it if Jarvis dropped the sarcastic tone because he’s really too tired for his unique brand of misogyny today. Jarvis drinks again, sarcastically asking Tony to forgive him for catching the eye of his betters. He begs not to take him behind the henhouse and give him another sound thrashing for the impertinence. Tony asks Jarvis again to stop being a pain and go make some breakfast instead. Natasha’s still upset and nothing raises the spirits like an ostrich egg omelet and a glass of champagne. He already grabbled a couple of bottles from the cellar this morning, but appear to have swallowed them quite accidentally. Jarvis does as told, mocking that obvious he doesn’t have anything better to do than running after his master all day.

Tony enters his bedroom again and asks Natasha, who sits on the bed, how she’s feeling this morning. Natasha claims she isn’t doing too badly. Tony climbs on the bed as well, explaining he’s spoken to the cardinal and he’s absolutely fine with postponing the wedding if that’s what Natasha really wants. It’s entirely understandable after the Hawkeye situation. Natasha doesn’t want to talk about it right now. She also wants to duck the meeting with Fury and the guys. Her implants are very itchy and she’s not feeling too sociable today. She wants to snuggle up for a while instead. Tony agrees to do that, and the two start to kiss and make love.

Nick Fury’s office, the Triskelion…

Quicksilver tells everyone that something about this situation doesn’t sit right with him. First, everybody they thought they knew about Thor was wrong and now Captain America’s supposed to be some kind of enemy agent? Pietro’s saying that this doesn’t sit right with him at all. Betty asks Janet if she’s okay. She claims she is but just needs a minute.

Suddenly, the lights go off! Wanda notices that the shields are all down and that somebody just switched off the building’s security. One of the Four Seasons looks outside in shock. The entire Triskelion headquarters is falling apart! Betty asks Nick what’s going on. Everyone just stares outside, and Betty and Fury hold hands. More building sides of the Triskelion collapse until nothing is left, and mysterious men wearing green uniforms fly outside. The men, all looking like each other, report that phase one is complete and that they can move over to Manhattan for phase two.

Stark’s townhouse…

Tony, having heard a noise outside, stops kissing Natasha and wants to know what that was. Natasha claims it doesn’t matter and pushes Tony back on the bed. Tony doesn’t understand what Natasha’s talking about. It sounds like World War three is going on out there. They’ve got to suit up and see if they can help. Natasha keeps kissing Tony and wants him to relax. She glides her arm under a pillow and Tony panics. Natasha takes out a gun and points it against Tony’s head!

Jarvis walks into the room carrying the breakfast on a plate, apologizing that they didn’t have any ostrich eggs, but he managed to find a quail’s egg and a rather good magnifying glass. Natasha spots him and… shoots Jarvis in his head! The butler falls on the ground; dead. Tony calls out to Jarvis but doesn’t get a response. Natasha points her gun against Tony’s head again and thanks him for the laughs.

Manhattan…

In the city, buildings start to explode and robotic feet crush parked cars. All of the citizens start to get scared and try to run in safety. As everyone runs, they stare in shock at all the army of red “robots” attacking the city.

The Triskelion…

All of the Ultimates, Reserves, Fury and Betty have survived the crash. Fury wants to know how that was possible, and Wanda smiles Fury can thank her later. She managed to save the top three floors, but couldn’t get the others out in time. After helping some soldiers get up, Pietro tells Wanda to keep in touch and runs off. Betty asks Wanda where her brother is going. Wanda tries to use the communicator in her ear to call Pietro back, fearing she can’t fight these things on her own. There must be dozens, or hundreds of them.

Pietro tells Wanda to be strong and rushes towards the city. There, he jumps over some cars and attacks one of the robots. He manages to disable the armor and as it collapses on the ground, Pietro reports that they’re the only chance these citizens have left.

Fury and the Four Seasons open the attack on the men wearing the green uniforms, but seem to be outnumbered. Fury wants to know where the other Reserves are and what happened to Iron Man and all the other super soldiers. Wanda doesn’t think that matters: she can do this. All she has to do is change the probability of something bad happening to them, but the equations are so complex. She could fry everyone with her powers if she gets this wrong.

Ships start to soar over the city. Fury looks up and thinks there must be millions of these things. While Wanda starts focusing her hex powers, Fury and the Seasons keep fighting. One of the green uniformed guys badly injures Fury and Betty screams out in fear. Wanda’s finally finished. She enlarges her powers in a big, pink sphere, which surrounds the entire nearby area, at the same time taking some of their enemies out.

The Rocketmen are all suited up. They report that they’re airborne and en route to Manhattan ground zero. They ask if they have intel on the hostiles. Sitting inside a helicopter, another soldier denies that. There’s no info available while the mainframe is down, but there’s hundreds of them. The regular soldiers have never been trained for this!

The Giant Men and the SHIELD soldiers all team-up, but are all attacked by the man with the green uniform, who keeps creating duplicates of himself non-stop. The foes are victorious and take out most of the Reserves, killing some of them in the process.

Meanwhile…

Still in his cell, Thor lies handcuffed on the floor. He senses something weird about the lightning. He calls out to his father, asking him if he hasn’t seen what’s happened while his glaze was elsewhere. Someone has stolen the lightning.

Manhattan…

A man wielding a hammer floats high above the air and controls the lightning, which he uses to destroy more buildings. He points his attention to Quicksilver, wanting to see how quick the mutant really is. He strikes lightning at Pietro, who panics.

Wanda desperately tries to contact Pietro, but doesn’t gain an answer. She fears they lost him! Fury, wounded, doesn’t think that matters. Wanda has to stay cool and keep her head together. He begs her to do that. Wanda keeps focusing her hex powers, but there’s too many of them. She just can’t keep it up. There’s just too many distinct sets of probabilities. Wanda collapses and her hex sphere disappears. The mysterious adversaries notice this and as they take down the remaining Seasons, they reach Betty and Fury.

Nearby…

Gunnar and his ally are impressed at the victory and overlook the damaged city from their battleship. Gunnar thinks that all this carnage must be very satisfying after everything the Americans have done to the colonel’s country. The colonel reveals to Loki he didn’t come here for revenge. He volunteered to lead this international collective because America’s plans simply had to be curtailed. He thinks the world is a safer place now this new Roman Empire has been restrained.

Los Angeles…

Los Angeles is almost completely destroyed as well. The attackers report that LA is clear, and Chicago and all the major military and nuclear facilities are under their control. The colonel wouldn’t think otherwise, and asks for any word about Washington.

Washington…

With most of the city caught in smoke from the many damages, the attackers explain that the White House and the Pentagon have both been subdued. And they won’t have any trouble from the European Union. Not now they’re holding the nuclear codes. The Colonel asks what about the Fantastic Four.

Manhattan…

The attackers believe the Fantastic Four are buried in the Baxter Building. Likewise, the X-Men have been restrained and their people are trawling their building now, looking for any mutant strays. The colonel says that’s good. They can now call Pym and tell him he’s needed for the containment procedure.

Loki still can’t believe this. The world’s last superpower and they’ve seized complete control in less than an hour. He’s impressed with the perfect planning, all plotted so meticulously. The Crimson Dynamo, the man in the red robot suit, doesn’t understand why Loki’s so excited. He means, he knows why their Chinese agents did this. They did it to stop more preemptive strikes. Likewise, the Russians, the Arabs and all the North Koreans. Even the Widow infiltrated these people for free because she feared what America might do next. But he doesn’t see why Loki would give a damn.

Loki claims it’s because he’s the Lord of Mischief, and what could be more mischievous than World War Three? Besides, he adds, the Ultimates had a Norse god on their side. It’s only fair that their enemies should get one, too. The guy with the hammer laughs at the damaged cities and tells his companions to look at it. The colonel asks for someone to get him a camera. He wants this everywhere. He wants this on every news broadcast and all over the Internet tonight. He reminds the world they said to stop making super people. They told them not to interfere with cultures they can never understand. This is what happens when America’s ambitions outstrip their capabilities. The empire takes a fall.

The Crimson Dynamo units and the duplicates work together to bring down the Statue of Liberty.

The colonel congratulates his team, while he finishes recording the terrible events: the Great Satan has just been liberated!

Characters Involved: 

Black Widow, Hawkeye, Iron Man, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, Wasp (all Ultimates)

Four Seasons, Rocketmen (all Reserves)

Thor (former Ultimates member)

Abomination, Colonel Abdul Al-Rahman, Crimson Dynamo, Hurricane, Perun, Schizoid Man, Swarm (all Liberators)

Jarvis (butler to Tony Stark)

Nick Fury

Betty Ross

Scientist holding Hawkeye captured (all unnamed)

Various SHIELD personnel (all unnamed)

Various citizens (all unnamed)

Various White House staff (all unnamed)

Story Notes: 

Though this issue marks their first appearance, it’s not always clear who the Abomination, the colonel, Crimson Dyanmo, Hurricane, Perun, Schizoid Man and the Swarm are. Next issue helps clear that up.

The Abomination is the green monster with the tail. The colonel is the leader of the group in the red/black uniform holding the laser-staff. The Crimson Dynamo seem to be with many and are the guys in the red robot suits. Hurricane is the black woman in the white suit, and Perun is the guy Thor mentions stole the lightning. The foe who wears the green uniform and created duplicates of himself is called Schizoid Man and the Swarm is the character covered in completely in black and can control insects.

This issue clears up that apparently, the Black Widow was the traitor on the team.

Issue Information: 
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