Wolverine (2nd series) #86

Issue Date: 
October 1994
Story Title: 
Claws along the Mohawk
Staff: 

An adventure of the past, present and future brought to you by Larry Hama (scribe), Ron Garney (illuminator), Al Vey & Bud LaRosa (maitres de encre), Pat Brosseau (scrivener), Steve Buccellato (applicator of hues), Bob Harras (fault-finder emeritus), Tom DeFalco (da big cheese)

Brief Description: 

On Muir Island, Elsie-Dee tells Bloodscream of the time when Albert, Hunter in Darkness, and she were transported back in time. There they met up with Forge and Wolverine, who were in the process of facing the Adversary. When they left to take care of him, Albert was forced to run the gauntlet by the Siksika tribe. When he was successful, he was named their war chief. Just then, a large blast is heard and Wolverine and Forge are displaced in time. She ends her story there since she told him the rest another time. Just then, Albert catches all of the mutant psi-energy in Tibet. They then rush off so that Bloodscream can tell Logan of his condition. In another timeline, Wolverine takes out a cyborg and meets up with Forge, Albert, and Elsie-Dee’s head. It is explained that the adamantium skeleton Elsie and Albert was that of Logan’s but from another timeline. Thanks to Elsie and Albert’s interference that timeline is no longer valid and therefore Logan is alive. Wolverine then joins up with Forge and his resistance to battle the cyborgs that are hunting mutants.

Full Summary: 

On Muir Island, off the coast of Scotland, a strangely modified stealth bomber lands and disgorges three disparate figures Bloodscream the ageless vampire and two Pierce-built androids, Elsie-Dee and Albert. Once on the ground, all three of them survey the damage. Bloodscream mentions that it is laid waste by cataclysmic weaponry.

Elsie replies that it “certainwy is” but this is where “Mister Wogan” was. At weast, until vewy wecentwy. Albert informs them that he is running a *bzt* pheromone trace scan. He says that *bzt* Logan was definitely here, but no longer. Upon widening the search parameters and once his long range scan is activated, his search comes up negative. He tells them that, if Logan is still on the face of this planet, he is hidden in a place that is shielded from his scanners. It is a technology not of this world. Elsie says that it’s wike they thought he was hidden back in the past. Bloodscream mentions ah, the untold tale of temporal displacement. He asks if they could regale him at long last. Elsie says they found a skeweton in an Indian buwial mound that had adamantium cwaws so they twaded their cwuise missile to the time-twistin’ lady, Spiwal, for a twip back in time. She asks if he ever told him that their fwiend, Puppy (Hunter in Darkness) was with them.

With that, Elsie proceeds to tell Bloodscream her tale. Just as the Hunter in Darkness, Albert and Elsie fall through the hole in the middle of the sky, Elsie mentions that they’re wanding wight in the middle of a battle between two Indian twibes. Albert tells her that actually, they seem to be *bzt* factions of a branch of the Siksika. They are *bzt* speaking a dialect of Algonquian, a language he has stored in his data banks.

During the battle, one of the warriors says that the dog-eating unbelievers have summoned hungry ghosts from the sky but he is Man-Killer Wolf, the strong right arm of the drummer with no sound and no weapon can pierce him. With that, he uses his weapon to smack Albert in the face. In short time, Albert recovers and replies why should he *bzt* pierce him when he can *bzt* slice him open. Albert then slices Man-Killer Wolf across the chest. When the other warriors notice that the ghost has disemboweled Man-killer Wolf, they converge on him in order to kill him. Elsie sees this and tells Puppy wet’s go, she thinks the wascals intend to disincorpowate Albert.

During the melee, Albert tells them that may have been their *bzt* intent but in reality, such a *bzt* radical restructuring of his corporeal mass is beyond their *bzt* primitive abilities. Elsie replies still, it’s just not vewy powite to abuse him merciwesswy with bwudgeons and cutwery. While the Hunter slashes through the warriors, Elsie tells him to heel, the wogues seem to have wearned their wesson. She says wet them take their head buwwy and wun home, wherever that may be. As the warriors run away, a voice comes from behind and says well, if it isn’t Elsie-Dee. The last time he saw her, she was making eight-ball combinations and clearing the table. Elsie turns to see Forge and asks how… Forge tells her to step inside his shelter and he’ll put her up to date.

Inside Forge’s shelter, he tells Elsie, Albert and Puppy that they came there from a later time than when Elsie and Albert left from. A future, ten years past their present. They came back there to this time string to try to stop a devious destructive speed of evil consequences that is being sown by the ancient mystic called the Adversary. It is a chain of trans-temporal events that could spread across the entire time continuum, infecting all time streams, including their own. Elsie asks the Adversary. Forge says that he’s the trickster, the bringer of chaos, he who dances to the drum with no sound. His goal is to bring chaos to all worlds and all time strings. To that end, the Adversary has taken over a Siksika shaman, Man-Killer Wolf, and made him a puppet through which to work his evil. He adds that a faction of the Siksika have gone over to him, but there are still many who are wise to the wiles of the trickster, such as the people of the village.

Pulling out a remote, Forge presses a button and the fire before them turns into a holographic image display which displays the image of the Adversary himself. He says that he had thought he had contained the Adversary for all time, but it escaped to the time string where they have finally tracked him down. Annoyed, Elsie asks Forge if there is a weason for his persistent use of the first person pwuwal. From behind Forge, the answer comes from Wolverine. He says that he figgered if Forge had his heart set on rompin’ and stompin’ through the bad north woods o’ the past he had better have the ol’ canuckle-head along to watch his butt.

Elsie immediately rushes over to Wolverine and gives him a hug. She says that she was afwaid he’d never find him again. Wolverine tells her that he wishes they had the time to catch up with each other, but it looks like things are heatin’ up over across the river in Man-Killer Wolf’s bailiwick. The ol’ trickster ain’t about to give up so easily. As they witness what is happening, Forge mentions that it’s a good thing he pre-set the remote scanner.

In another location, Man-Killer Wolf tells the Adversary that he has failed. His warriors have deserted him and he sings his death song. The Adversary tells him that his problem, besides his propensity for pretentious blathering, is his utter lack of a sense of humor. It’s a great joke, doesn’t he see. It’s a trick, like life and death. At that moment, the Adversary reaches out Man-Killer Wolf that he is healed. The Adversary tells him that he is more than healed, he is transfigured. He is the conduit of his power on this astral plane. He then sends him away and tells him to get back across the river and bring him the dog-soldier of his enemy Naze, the shaman-conjuror, he who calls himself Forge. He tells him to bring him to the great falling waters and he will unmake him!

Before long, Forge’s shelter is destroyed by the returning Man-Killer Wolf. Surveying the destruction, Wolverine says that he’d say that Man-Killer Wolf just got himself a major tune-up. Forge adds that he is now a channel for the forces that the Adversary can conjure out of chaos. A demonic looking Man-Killer Wolf makes another pass and calls out dog soldier Forge and tells him that his doom is upon him, for he has been summoned to the great trickster.

As Man-Killer Wolf grabs Forge by the throat, Logan asks Forge what his deal is. Is he just a stand-in for the big guy or has he got any juice of his own. Forge says that he is a vessel only. Wolverine replies then adamantium can cut him clean to the bone. When Wolverine slashes their foe, Man-Killer Wolf screams in pain. Forge then proceeds to blast him with his gun which causes a burned Man-Killer Wolf to run off towards the waterfall. Wolverine mentions that is where the Adversary is lurkin’ in the cut for them. Forge says that they have to settle this, it’s the only way.

Speaking up, Elsie tells “Wogan” that she and Albert and Puppy can come awong and help. However, Wolverine tells her no, this is between him, Forge, and the Adversary. He says that it’s gonna be her job to stay there and watch out for the Siksika while they’re gone, they’re good people. He asks her if she can do that for him. Elsie answers that she pwomises.

Once Wolverine and Forge leave, Elsie turns to face the hostile remaining members of the Siksika tribe and tells Albert that the wocals don’t seem vewy appweciative of their custodial wesponsibiwity. Albert replies that they are *bzt* rightfully annoyed with them. Their *bzt* presence there has seemingly brought *bzt* destruction and terror down upon them. As the members to the tribe begin to raise their weapons, Albert says that he fears they *bzt* mean to do them grievous harm. Elsie tells him that she pwomised Mister Wogan. They can’t hurt them, no matter what they do to them. Albert assures her that he *bzt* understands.

Just then, the members of the tribe line up in two columns. Elsie asks why they are wining up and Albert tells her that they intend to *bzt* have them run the gauntlet. Elsie asks gauntwet? As he is dragged away, he tells Elsie that it is a *bzt* test of sorts. Apparently he is *bzt* designated as the first contestant. Standing at the beginning of the line, Albert points down to the shaman holding an arrow at the other end. He tells Elsie that it is his *bzt* task to make his way between the files as *bzt* the whole tribe pummels him and take the arrow from *bzt* the shaman. As Albert walks through the file, the members of the tribe beat him unmercifully and set him aflame. Albert claims that this is extremely *bzt* interesting. There is no mention *bzt* in his data banks of the practice of igniting participants in the *bzt* gauntlet. He has been running a *bzt* filter program that matches *bzt* vocabulary and syntax to build a *bzt* functional model of this Algonquian dialect.

Continuing to make his way through the gauntlet, Albert is constantly pummeled by their weapons. Unnerved, he tells Elsie that it may be possible to *bzt* trace the roots of their complex transient verbs. He points out that the fractual pattern of *bzt* obsidian-edged weapons is idiosyncratic. The arrow follows what was *bzt* thought to be a Pikuni pattern or perhaps it is a trophy from *bzt* a raiding party. Eventually, Albert reaches the shaman and asks him if the *bzt* arrow is Pikuni. The shaman admits that it is and that it was taken from a great war chief. Albert takes it from the shaman’s hand and says then it has *bzt* returned to a war chief. His hair ablaze, Albert turns to face the tribe and raises the arrow high. He tells them that he claims *bzt* the arrow and asks if there is any who will *bzt* challenge his claim to be war chief of the Siksika. In a unanimous cry, all of the tribe hails Albert’s triumph as Elsie and Puppy join in on congratulating him.

Just then, a loud blast is heard. Albert mentions that it is the *bzt* direction that Logan and *bzt* Forge went off in. Elsie exclaims the falling waters. Once they make it to the falling waters, Albert says residual e-m radiation and *bzt* plasma flux. He tells them this was no *bzt* explosion, it was a temporal *bzt* displacement. Elsie asks they were bwasted out of this time stwing and into another. It can’t be that Wogun has gone back to the future and weft them there. What about the skeweton. Elsie says that he must still be back there, maybe only a few years in the future fwom now. Albert tells him that it is definitely within the *bzt* realm. Elsie replies that they’ll just have to keep wight on wooking for him. With that, Elsie, Albert, and the Hunter in Darkness continue on their search.

Back in present time, Elsie tells Bloodscream that the west they already told him. How they stayed with the Siksika until their batewwies wan down and they had to put themselves to system sweep and how Puppy went off with his own kind. At that moment, Albert tells Elsie that he’s getting a *bzt* reading and that all the psi-blocks are *bzt* down. There are *bzt* now numerous mutants radiating psi-energy along the entire *bzt* wavelength halfway around the *bzt* world in Tibet. Elsie exclaims wet’s go as they all pile into the stealth bomber. She adds that Mister Bwoodscweam has to deliver his message to Mister Wogan before it’s too late.

Just as Albert, the last one to enter the bomber, enters the aircraft a tentacle of the Phalanx is seen. Once the stealth bomber flies off, Elsie says to Bloodscream that he certainwy must be a vewy good fwiend of Mister Wogan’s to go to all this twouble for him. Bloodscream says that you might say he occupies a good deal of his thoughts.

In a future time string, an individual wearing an armored suit is being pursued by a robotic creature. The creature announces that it is CX28B and its target is acquired and identifies it as a mutant in type II armored fighting suit. Command gives CX28B the firing order to reduce the mutant to composite molecules. Hearing and acknowledging its command, CX28B informs the mutant to prepare to go into the long dark system crash and fires a shot on its target. Using its skill, the mutant is able to dodge the blast and says that you’d think the geeks would lose their sick sense o’ humor when they get cyborged up. Yeah, you’d think. CX28B informs the mutant that they have to contend with ridding the world of genetic filth like them, they have to laugh.

Just then, one of CX28B shots connects with the mutant, dislodging him of his armored suit. When the mutant arises, it is revealed to be Wolverine. He thanks CX28B and tells him that the ol’ tin-suit was just slowin’ him down. He then pops his adamantium claws and tells his pursuer that it’s time they go to claw city. After slashing CX28B across the face, Wolverine asks him what’s the matter; he don’t hear him laughin’.

At that moment, Forge appears flanked by others wearing type II armored fighting suits. He proceeds to tell Logan that it’s pretty difficult for even a cyborg to find a face full of adamantium very amusing. He then tells him it’s good to see him again. All this time, he thought he was dead. That time they fought the Adversary back at the waterfall… Logan tells him things got hairy, what can he say. Forge asks but how…? Logan asks him if he remembers that Man-Killer Wolf summoned up the ol’ Adversary and how the ol’ trickster set off that temporal displacement. Somehow, he got ejected from the time vortex about ten years into the future from the time they left Elsie-Dee and Albert…

From behind Logan, a voice from a box says that’s what happened. Wogan disappeared into their future back then and he died. Logan opens up the box to reveal Elsie’s head and asks who is tellin’ the story. Elsie says that the Siksika buried him in the mound and that’s how they discovered his adamantium skeweton that time they were with Spiwal and Mystique. But he’s not dead. That explains how the skeweton disappeared but she wonders how could Wogan die in the past and still be awive in the future.

The answer comes from one of the armored soldiers flanking Forge, revealed to be Albert. He says that it was *bzt* temporal negation. When they displaced *bzt* themselves back into that timeline, they negated it. That whole *bzt* time line for Logan ceased to exist. Elsie asks how Forge could wemember it and how Wogan could wemember it. Forge answers that it was because he was still battling the Adversary and was caught up in his own time line, an alternate time reality. As for Logan, he believes he has been permanently affected by a temporal paradox field.

Just then, various aircraft arrive on the scene. Forge tells Logan that their transport has arrived and mentions that things are going to heat up around there right quick. He asks him if he wants to throw in with them or if he is still playing the lone wolf. Logan asks truth, justice an’ the freedom to be a genetic anomaly. Forge tells him more or less. On the aircraft, the pilot informs Forge to get his team on board. The cyborg has designated this location to his controller and they’ve got bandits coming.

As they all enter the aircraft, Elsie asks Forge if he thinks he can take a wittle time out fwom all this bwasting to make her a new body wike he did before. Forge says sure thing but replacing that little pink dress, that’s gonna be a tough one. They can fabricate cybernetic modules in a snap, but pleating and tucking taffeta is something else altogether. On board, Logan tells Elsie not to worry her little head. Pulling her dress out of his pocket, he tells her it was more indestructible than her old body, so he thought he’d better save it. Elsie is overjoyed and tells Wogan that she “woves” him.

Characters Involved: 

Elsie-Dee and Albert

Bloodscream

A piece of the Phalanx on Muir Island

In the past:

Wolverine/Logan

Elsie-Dee, Albert, and the Hunter in Darkness (Puppy)

Forge

Man-Killer Wolf

The Adversary

Various members of the Siksika tribe (all unnamed)

In the future:

Wolverine/Logan

Forge

Albert and Elsie-Dee’s head

Cyborg CX28B

Various other troops led by Forge (all unnamed)

Story Notes: 

While at first glance, this comic seems to be very, very confusing. However, it should be noted that ¾ of this comic is basically a retelling of what happened to Elsie-Dee, Albert, and Hunter in Darkness after the goings on in Wolverine (2nd series) #53. Back then, Wolverine still had his adamantium skeleton. It was ripped out of him by Magneto in X-Men (2nd series) #25, and the follow-up Wolverine story was Wolverine (2nd series) #75, Wolverine’s first issue in his own series without his adamantium.

This also explains what Elsie-Dee was referring to when she mentioned how “Albert is none the worse for wear despite the “howwible time with the Siksika when they set him on fire and made him wun the gauntlet.” [Wolverine (2nd series) #82]

Albert, Elsie-Dee and the Hunter in Darkness traded their cruise missile to Spiral and Mystique in order to go back in time back in Wolverine (2nd series) #53. It was in that same issue that Albert and Elsie-Dee found an adamantium skeleton. This issue clears up that mystery and where it came from.

Elsie-Dee told the rest of her tale to Bloodscream back in Wolverine (2nd series) #84.

Albert registering the numerous mutants radiating psi-energy in Tibet is a result of the battle with the Phalanx as depicted in Cable (1st series) #16.

Logan being permanently affected by a temporal paradox field is a result of his traveling forward in time to the Crunch back in Wolverine (2nd series) #52.

Elsie-Dee and Albert are to never be seen again in the Wolverine comic since. They are next seen in Generation X #42. Other than that, they were seen in Exiles #85-86. Almost entirely forgotten since this issue.

Even though this is the final appearance of Elsie-Dee and Albert in the Wolverine series, Bloodscream will reappear in issue #123 along with his partner in crime, Roughhouse.

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