Having just offered his services to the Skrulls, Deadpool begins to explain his origins. With guns pointed at his head, he tells the Skrulls that he was created by humans to kill humans. He continues with his story.
(Flashback)
A naked Deadpool is wired into a vat of pink fluid, screaming in pain as scientists around him observe his condition on monitors. He tells the Skrulls that it took a long time for Weapon X to transform him from who he was into Deadpool. But ultimately, after he had been used up body and soul, he was literally flushed away. Whilst he thought Weapon X was bad, he discovered the place where they sent failed experiments was worse. This is where he met Dr Killbrew.
He eventually escaped and killed everyone at the facility, burning it to the ground. But that didn’t make him feel better, as by then the damage had been done. He became exactly what they designed him for – a killer of men. But now he would get paid for it. In one operation, he got paid two million dollars in cash from a man who was clearly intimidated by him. But that was all during the good old days, which now seem to be over along with the human race.
(Now)
Back in the Skrull base, a handcuffed Deadpool is standing at the end of a conference table with Skrulls sitting all around it. He tells the Skrulls they know who he is and what he can do and that he wants to be in the Skrull business. The Skrulls quietly confer between themselves and eventually one of them speaks and asks Deadpool to repeat his story but this time into the universal translator hanging from the ceiling.
Hearing this, Deadpool is annoyed. He’d been practicing that speech for days and they didn’t get any of it? As he leans forward to repeat his story into the microphone, a blast of gas sprays out of the device into Deadpool’s face, causing him to collapse on the floor. One of the Skrulls orders him to be sent to the sci-ops department to be dissected and examined.
Cheyenne Mountain, Colorado, which was the base for NORAD, is now under Skrull control and is being used as the headquarters as the invasion force’s Sci-ops division. In it, Deadpool lies on a metal table with surgical implements around him and numerous tubes and wires inserted into him.
In the command room, the Skrull science chief and a super Skrull discuss the results of Deadpool’s examination. The science chief finds them fascinating but the super Skrull considers Deadpool as nothing more than a bug. The science chief explains that Deadpool has a healing factor that’s off the charts and he wants to request that the genetic data is added to the genesis matrix, line wide. The super Skrull realizes this would mean that all new super Skrulls would be like Deadpool, to which the science chief confirms that, if he meant they would be immune to death, then yes, they would be just like Deadpool. A delirious Deadpool mutters from the table that they really like him... they really like him.
Shortly, in the Skrull command vessel, high above Earth, the Skrull fleet commanders are being briefed via monitor by the science chief, who explains what they have found with Deadpool and requests permission to precede with the plan. One of the Skrull commanders say the prospectus looks promising and the science chief replies that he is eagerly awaiting the decision.
Two Hours later, back at Cheyenne Mountain, the science chief receives permission to add the genetic material to the matrix. With that, he presses a button and the chemicals are fed into giant tubes which contain developing super Skrulls.
Twenty-four Hours later, the Skrull science chief excitedly announces the procedure was a success and that a new generation of super Skrulls has been born... never to know death. He looks down into his lab to view twenty super Skrulls dressed up as Deadpool but with the distinctive Skrull chin and point ears.
The real Deadpool, who is chained to the wall, says that if the Skrulls plan on killing him it won’t work. The science chief ponders Deadpool’s statement and then accepts the challenge and deploys the original super Skrull to dispose of him. The super Skrull ignites him flame-powered arm and advances on Deadpool as the science chief walks away.
A worried Deadpool appeals to the science chief and calls him an egghead. The chief seems confused by the term until Deadpool points out it means he is a smart person. When the science chief accepts he is smart, Deadpool asks why he is being so stupid. This angers the chief and he orders the super Skrull to incinerate Deadpool. However Deadpool persists and asks the chief to think about what it was that made Deadpool able to take down an entire Skrull squad and the super Skrull. He says the new batch of super Skrulls may be able to heal but will they won’t be able to think and move like him. Not unless Deadpool trains them.
The science chief immediately dismisses this idea but Deadpool continues talking. He tells the chief that it’s obvious he is trying to climb the ranks within the Skrull army, given how eager he was to try the experiments to create the new batch of super Skrulls… He wanted to impress his superiors. Deadpool offers to train them and says he wants to climb the ladder just as much as the chief. With that, he removes one of his hands from the chains hanging him to the wall, which puzzles the chief as to how he managed it. “Ancient Chinese secret,” Deadpool remarks. He then asks the chief if they have a deal, to which the chief agrees and the two men shake hands, much to the surprise of the super Skrull. Deadpool lets out an evil laugh, which causes the chief to recoil away surprised. An embarrassed Deadpool apologizes and offers to get to work right away.
Standing on a platform so he has a better view, Deadpool starts an exercise. In the manner of a boxing referee, he introduces the sides. He announces the Deadpool super Skrulls in the red corner and the original super Skrulls in the green. The original super Skrulls consist of about twenty super Skrulls wearing costumes of various Earth heroes. Deadpool then shouts “Go” and the two sides engage in combat. As the fight starts, the voices in Deadpool’s head comment on how much of a genius he is.
Afterwards, the super Skrull slams Deadpool into a wall as the science chief chastises him for killing an entire squad of super Skrulls. Deadpool points out that it was the original, out-dated super Skrulls that were killed and that they outnumbered the new versions at five to one. The science chief admits that was remarkable as Deadpool continues. He says that the heroes like Wolverine, Black Panther and Iron Man will find any weakness the Skrulls have and hit it with everything they have. But they don’t have him on their side and, as he showed earlier, even his kung-fu can beat a super Skrull.
With that he gestures to the super Skrull standing next to him, who is angered by Deadpool’s claim. He says there is only one method to take down the heroes on the planet and that method is madness. Exasperated, the science chief yells at Deadpool, saying he is driving him insane. However, Deadpool just calmly stands there and says “Not yet… but I’m working on it.”
Next, Deadpool is stood at a long counter filled with the Deadpool super Skrulls. All of them are holding their katanas in their right hand with the left one stretched out in front of them. Deadpool tells them that mastery of hand-to-hand combat is important… even when they don’t have hands. With that, he counts down from three and all the super Skrulls chop of their left hand. However, the real Deadpool stops his sword before it touches his hand. He sets his sword down and tells the Skrulls that being resistant to psychic suggestion is essential. When one of the Skrulls calls him out for not chopping off his own hand, Deadpool just tells him that losing body parts is part of the job and that the best thing to do is just pick it back up and hope it reattaches itself.
(next day)
The Deadpool super Skrulls are all lined up against a wall, with Deadpool standing in front of them holding a big gun. He tells them that timing is everything and if you don’t have timing then their jokes will fall flat. He picks one of the super Skrulls and gets him to come forward. Deadpool then goes “Knock knock,” to which the super Skrulls is confused. Deadpool then whispers in the ear of the super Skrulls, who then understands the demonstration.
Deadpool then says “knock knock” again, to which the super Skrull begins to reply “who’s th…?” but doesn’t get to finish, as Deadpool fires the gun into his head spraying blood everywhere and shocking the other Skrulls. He then bows to the super Skrulls, all of which stand in stunned silence. When Deadpool inquires as to why they didn’t think it was funny, they all suddenly start clapping, which makes Deadpool happy again. Then one of the super Skrulls points a gun at another and says “knock knock” and blows the other Skrulls head off. The rest of the Skrulls also start doing this and soon the whole squad is blowing off each other’s heads and laughing while the real Deadpool looks on.
Elsewhere, the science chief and some of his fellow scientists are watching the events on a monitor. One of them says that the super Skrulls have lost their minds, whilst the chief says they were all perfect…. “like him.” The chief realizes Deadpool has a mental illness and that he has given the entire batch of super Skrulls the same illness. He orders one of the scientists to kill the Deadpool and the remaining super Skrulls. When the scientist points out that it will take everyone to kill them, the chief screams at him to send everyone then.
The original super Skrull and a small squad of Skrulls enter the room with the Deadpool super Skrulls, all of which are still shooting at each other. The Deadpool Skrulls then start to attack the Skrulls who just entered. The ship’s original super Skrull blasts a Deadpool counterpart with an ice beam and then shatters him with a fireball. He tells the science chief that it’s a massacre and asks what he should do. The chief tells him to find the real Deadpool, as he is the only one who has been able to control these super Skrulls.
In the chaos, however, Deadpool has slipped away to another room and is speaking with someone else via comm. system. The other person seems relieved to hear from Deadpool and tells him that he is impressed. Deadpool calmly tells the voice that, if there is a fire, then call a fireman; if there is a crime, then call a cop; and if there is a Skrull invasion, then… “holla atch boy!” On the other end of the monitor, Nicky Fury grimaces in agreement.
