Longshot Saves the Marvel Universe # 3

Issue Date: 
February 2014
Story Title: 

Christopher Hastings (Writer), Jacopo Camagni and Victor Calderon-Zurita (Pencillers), Jacopo Camagni and Terry Pallot (Inkers), Matt Milla (Colourist), VC’s Joe Caramagna (Letters), Manny Mederos (Production Design), David Nakayama (Cover Artist), Jordan D. White (Editor), Axel Alonso (Editor in Chief), Joe Quesada (Chief Creative Officer), Dan Buckley (Publisher), Alan Fine (Executive Producer)

Brief Description: 

Thanks to Mr. Dapples, the SHIELD helicarrier narrowly stops before it hits the city below. Longshot is relieved but Chaos is annoyed, as he wanted to see the carnage. Elsewhere, Spider-Man accidentally ends up in Dr. Strange’s house, where he finds Sonja, Jennifer and Mr. Dapples. Order bursts in looking for the teddy bear and so Spider-Man rescues the two women and the bear. As he swings through the city, he is briefed on the situation and decides to take the bear to a scientist so it can be examined. On the street, Chaos summons a number of alternate reality villains to wreck havoc in the city. However, Longshot uses his powers to cause the real Captain America to show up to stop a werewolf counterpart. When he is then attacked by two vampires, Longshot uses his powers to cause Blade to fall out of a taxi and save him. Chaos becomes annoyed and summons more allies in the form of Carnage and Venom. The group deals with Venom but Order suddenly shows up with his team and takes care of Carnage. Chaos and Order have a little stand-off before resuming their fight. Longshot tries to use his powers to stop the fight but he discovers he cannot trigger them anymore, as he has apparently shorted them out. Elsewhere, Spider-Man takes the two women and the bear to see Dr. Chip Dipson, who informs them all that reality is tearing itself apart.  

Full Summary: 

(Slope Park, Brooklyn)
Longshot sits on the pavement, looking up at the SHIELD helicarrier that is falling down towards him. Chaos, one half of the fractured In-Betweener, sits next to him and asks him if he is just magically lucky. Longshot replies he usually is, to which Chaos follows it up by asking if it stops working if he pushes his luck too far. Longshot replies it does and Chaos, staring at the helicarrier, asks if this situation qualifies. Longshot concentrates really hard and tries to will his luck powers to work.

In Dr. Strange’s sanctum sanctorum, Sonja is asleep on the sofa, holding her daughter Jennifer. Jennifer is watching TV commercials but changes over to the news when Sonja is woken up by a phone call. Jennifer spots Longshot on the TV, as the news station is reporting on the crashing helicarrier. Jennifer’s demonic teddy bear, Mr. Dapples, also spots the news report and is seemingly alarmed by what is about to happen.

On the helicarrier, Dazzler is sat in the pilot’s seat, trying to find a way to avert the crash. She presses various buttons in the hope one of them will do something. Somehow, Mr. Dapples exerts his influence and appears on the helicarrier. On the ground, Longshot winces his face and wills himself to think lucky thoughts. With a matter of meters to spare, the helicarrier comes to a complete stop, much to the relief of Longshot and all the civilians in the area. Chaos is a little disappointed, as he wanted to see the ship blow up Brooklyn. Longshot tentatively apologizes but takes it back after a second thought. Chaos tells him he won’t stop his good time, now that Order is out of town. He wants to see just how lucky Longshot can be.

(SHIELD fallback base)
Monitoring the scene on a holographic display, Order tells the brainwashed Dr. Strange that Chaos is taking action. Dr. Strange asks if he can have a moment of his time and then enquires about Mr. Dapples. When Order tells him it is a multi-dimensional unknowably powerful teddy bear, he confesses that it is currently sat in his sanctum and asks if he should retrieve it.

(Lower Manhattan)
As Spider-Man swings through the city, he tells one of his spider-bots to return to base for repair, as it is seemingly picking up commercial radio transmissions. Before he can react, though, he looks up to see the Hulk hurtling down on him. The Hulk yells he is busy and orders Spider-Man out of his way. With that, he swats the wall-crawlers and propels him through the circular window of Dr. Strange’s sanctum sanctorum.

Elsewhere, Chaos is standing on the street casting a spell. As dark clouds circle around him, he tells Longshot to see how lucky he is against the random forces of possible infinite timelines and universes. Past horrors repeated, the terrible nows right next to us and the what ifs of the future. The pavement below them starts to crack and purple energy shines through. Out of the cracks a number of deadly creatures rise out. Standing before Longshot is Magneto, Dracula, a werewolf version of Captain America and a vampire Wolverine.

Longshot stares at them in shock and tells Chaos that he doesn’t know what to do. Chaos smiles and says to go luck himself. He then pulls a loose thread from Longshot’s costume and tells him to see a tailor.

In the sanctum sanctorum, Spider-Man holds his head and wonders why the Hulk didn’t set his spider-sense off. Sonja and Jennifer are shocked at his sudden entrance but, before anyone can say anything, Order and his brainwashed team walk in. Order demands that they surrender the bear but is shocked to see the demonic reflection in a nearby mirror. Spider-Man also spots Mr. Dapple’s true form in the mirror and grabs hold of the two women. He acts on an educated guess at the situation and jumps out of the window, taking the two women and the teddy with him.

As they swing through the city, Sonja tells Spider-Man it’s nice to meet him. He bluntly replies that they can have pleasantries once they are finished. Sonja tells him that Dr. Strange had informed her there was some powerful force in Mr. Dapples. Spider-Man agrees, as it seems to be strong enough to attract the attention of SHIELD’s totalitarian, anti-magic regime. The same one which seems to have possessed Dr. Strange and several of his contemporaries in a trance. He asks how he can help and Sonja replies that Dr. Strange wanted to inspect Mr. Dapples with a crystal ball or something. Spider-Man tells her they will have SHIELD on them if they try doing that; instead he will have a scientist look at the bear.

Down below, Longshot has been pinned down by the werewolf Captain America. His luck powers suddenly activate and a circular shield suddenly slams into the werewolf’s head. He turns to see the real Captain America, who promptly shoots his alternate version with a gun that vaporizes him. Longshot asks what happened and Cap explains that the gun was a chronodisplacer. Twenty years ago, he was cursed with lycanthropy but for a brief period he was warped to the future where he saw himself human again. It gave him the strength to carry on and eventually become cured. Ever since then, he has waited to be on the other side so he can be there to send his past self back. Chaos smiles and muses that it’s a horrible paradox. He asks if Longshot’s luck did that but the “lucky one” tells him it could be worse, for example he is a clone of his own son. Cap looks stunned and confused by the revelation but Longshot just takes it in his stride.

Suddenly, Dracula appears behind Cap and tries to bite his neck. Wolverine grabs him from the other side and tries to bite his neck too, causing the two bloodsuckers to argue about who is the real king of the vampires. Cap bends over and pushes them both away, telling them that Hitler had loads of vampires in his army and it literally the reason why he now wears armor. As the two vampires lunge at Longshot instead, he suddenly realizes he doesn’t have armor.

As Longshot tussles with the vampires, his eye glows and his powers activate. A little way off, Magneto uses a phone booth, but he gets the Jean Grey School answer machine and politely informs them he seems to have fallen prey to some terrible fall allergies. He asks them to use Cerebro to find a local pharmacy. As he hangs up, he sneezes, causing him to use his powers and magnetically blast everything in the vicinity. One of the taxis caught in the carnage crashes to the ground and the trunk pops open and Blade falls out. The vampire hunter is confused for a second but then spots Dracula and takes out his sword. Before Dracula can react, Blade throws the sword and impales him in the chest, causing him disintegrate in flames. Wolverine comes up behind him, but Blade doesn’t need to look round to stab him in the chest with a dagger, killing him too.

Down the street, Chaos is watching and yells for them to stop killing his guys. Blade looks around and wonders how he got into the trunk of a taxi in the first place.

On the helicarrier, Dazzler finally has the systems all stable but an alarm suddenly goes off and she sees that a bunch of giant Doombots have appeared. On the street, Longshot, Cap and Blade look up to see the enormous Doombots, as well as the Venom symbiote on the Punisher, and Carnage on the Silver Surfer. Blade says he is out of his element but Longshot says he can help as he strains to use his powers again. As one of the Doombots strides down the street, it crashes into a building, causing a huge bell at the top to fall out. As it falls, Spider-Man grabs it with his webbing. He explains that it doesn’t matter who the symbiote decides to stick to, it’s always a matter of applying sonic vibrations. He slams the bell down next to the Punisher and the symbiote screams in pain as the bell creates a deadly noise. The symbiote splits off from an exhausted Punisher. Spider-Man tells Longshot he can’t stay there and asks if he can handle it.

As he leaves, some of his webbing touches Longshot and he gets a vision from it. He sees J. Jonah Jameson and some of the Avengers confronting Spider-Man and saying that Doctor Octopus has killed him and infiltrated his mind. The Avengers want to take him into custody but Longshot tells them that he has changed. Spider-Man turns to him and asks what he is doing there. JJJ says he will be put to death for it but Longshot tries to tell them he is doing more good alive than dead and his friend agrees. With that, he takes out a cosmic cube and shows them.

In the real world, Spider-Man slaps him over the head and tells him to wake up. He says that his uniform indicates he has some kind of superhero competence and then asks him to throw a knife or something. Longshot looks out and sees the battle between the various forces waging on. Cap asks if they have any ideas on freeing the Silver Surfer from Carnage, to which Spider-Man yells extreme heat works well. Ghost Rider appears and tells them hellfire should suffice. He fires his mystical shotgun and hits Carnage square in the head.

Order arrives at the scene with his team and SHIELD agents in tow. He greets his brother Chaos and Magneto waves to Wanda. Up on a nearby roof, Spider-Man returns to a waiting Sonja and Jennifer. He decides to take advantage of the distraction and leave.

On the street, Order tells his brother he should be powerless, but Chaos cockily replies he isn’t. Order says he has methodically removed sorcerers, demons, mystical artifacts, monsters, genetic anomalies and countless other contributors to bedlam. Chaos simply tells him he has censored poets, artists, dreams and fun. Order tells him his fun world would destroy life but Chaos retorts by saying his brother would destroy any reason to have it. In the interest of peace, Order asks his brother to submit but Chaos childishly tells him to kiss his butt. Summoning more troops, Chaos reignites the fight again and the two side clash. Order becomes enraged and says he will restrain Chaos, but he doesn’t spot his own uniform ripping at the seams, revealing his cosmic energies underneath.

Longshot tries as hard as he can to use his luck powers to solve the situation but he struggles to do so. Unbeknown to him, all the times he recently used his powers, he has caused something bad to happen right after receiving good luck for himself. When he fell out of the sky and Thor caught him, he cause Thor to accidentally fly into a banner being trailed by an advertisement plane. When Captain America appeared to defeat his werewolf counterpart, the shield he threw ended up going through the window of a nearby pub and smashing into a TV. When he used his powers to bring Blade into the fight, he caused the taxi driver that brought him to get stuck in traffic. Longshot continues to strain to use his powers but the universe subtly tells him that he has used it all up and nothing can help him now.

Elsewhere, Spider-Man drops down on to a quiet street with the two women. They go to a house and, when they open it, they see Sonja’s friend, Diane Dipson. She is confused to see them when she opens the door and Spider-Man informs them he is there to see Dr. Dipson. Inside, they are talking to Diane’s father Chip in his laboratory. Chip tells him he is busy at the moment because a great cosmic deity has split into two separate beings, expending considerable powers completely unchecked by each other. Spider-Man says they were just there, to which Chip tells him they must have seen that they are fraying the threads of reality. 

Characters Involved: 



Deadpool, Dr. Strange, Ghost Rider, Scarlet Witch (Order’s team)
Carnage/Silver Surfer, Dracula, Magneto, Venom/Punisher, Werewolf Captain America, Wolverine (Chaos’s team)


Captain America

Diane Dipson
Dr. Chip Dipson

“Mr. Dapples”

(in Longshot’s vision)
J. Jonah Jameson
Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Wolverine (all Avengers)

Story Notes: 

At the time of this issue’s publication, Doctor Octopus’s mind was in Peter Parker/Spider-Man’s body, but nobody knew. [Superior Spider-Man]

Longshot is indeed a clone of his son, Shatterstar. In X-Factor (1st series) #259 Shatterstar went back in time to an early period in Mojoverse’s history. He was found by Arize, who took DNA samples of him and altered them to create the perfect being, Longshot. Years later, Longshot and Dazzler had a child, who turned out to be Shatterstar.

Captain America famously turned into a lycanthropic “Cap-Wolf” in the much-derided but also much cult-referenced Man and Wolf storyline. [Captain America (1st series) #402-408] Cap’s reference to it occurring “twenty years ago” does not fit it in Marvel’s “sliding timeline,” but is (mostly) accurate for real-world time passage. This issue was published in 2014 while the Cap-Wolf storyline was in 1992, twenty-two years previously.

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