Ultimate Spider-Man #66

Issue Date: 
December 2004
Story Title: 
Even We Don't Believe This

Brian Michael Bendis (writer), Mark Bagley (pencils), Scott Hanna (inks), J. D. Smith (colors), Chris Eliopoulos (letters), Nick Lowe (asst. editor), Ralph Macchio (editor), Joe Quesada (editor in chief), Dan Buckley (publisher)

Brief Description: 

Aunt May screams at Peter to wake up. Peter does, staring at the scenery with a look of confusion, as May begins packing boxes to move out of the house soon. Peter wanders around the house, wondering where he is and what has happened. he finds a web cartridge and sniffs it, shocking himself awake. Elsewhere, Wolverine wakes up, complaining about the awful smell, and staring at his own body, wondering why is his all of a sudden hairy and putrid. Peter gets a phone call from Wolverine, and the two argue over what they've done to each other - they are now trapped in each other's bodies! Peter (in Wolverine's body) tells Wolverine (in Peter's body) that he has to go to school, or Peter is going to fail. Wolverine agrees to take Peter's body to school, and sits through classes angrily. Meanwhile, a shooting takes place outside near where Peter is waiting with Wolverine's body, and Peter rushes into action with his new claws. An accident ensues, with a van flipping off the road and crushing Wolverine's. Inside the school, the students flock to the window, while Peter shakes his head.

Full Summary: 

Brian Bendis introduces the story. "Once in a while a story comes along that defines a writer... a story so powerful that he doesn't want to tell it, he HAS to tell it. This is not one of those stories." Mark Bagley beats his own head into his drawing board.

The Parker home, Friday - May screams at Peter to wake up for school. Peter wakes up, scratching himself and looking around. He finds Aunt May at the kitchen table, packing boxes to move out. Pete freezes, and asks what the hell is going on. May says she wants to get an early start on packing because it relaxes her. Pete still doesn't understand. May tells him to go get his books, and go to school. Peter walks around the house with confusion in his eyes, and heads for the basement to get his books. There, he looks around at all of the science lab equipment and finds a web cartridge, which he sniffs. He looks in a backpack and sees the name "Peter Parker." He snaps wide awake as he realizes that something is horribly wrong. Just then, Mary-Jane walks in, and starts kissing Peter. He is surprised, but as she hugs him, a cocky smile comes to his face.

Elsewhere - Wolverine wakes up, surrounded by empty beer cans and cigar butts. He starts complaining of a ferocious odor, and looks at himself. He freaks out, wondering why he is all of a sudden hairy and smells bad. He looks under his bedsheets, and stares in awe. He rushes to the bathroom to look at himself in a mirror. He looks at his reflection in shock, and as he stares, his claws pop straight through his opposite arm. He screams in pain.

Parker home - Peter heads back into the basement, telling Mary-Jane that he's giving up on school for now. Mary-Jane just stares, asking if he needs to go out as Spider-Man. Peter gives her a look, and tells her yes. She says that she still has his costume at her house, and Peter tells her to go get it right away. He says that school is a colossal waste of time - there's nothing MJ can't learn from going on a good hunt. He continues to nod at the rest of her questions, and goes inside. May calls him, telling him that there is an urgent call from the Daily Bugle. Pete takes the phone, snapping angrily at Aunt May. It is Wolverine on the line, demanding to know why he is trapped in a hairy beast body, apparently infected by some kind of mutant virus. They realize that they are now stuck in each other's bodies. Peter tells Wolverine to take his body to Midtown high school right away and go to classes. Wolverine refuses. Peter continues to insist, but pops his claws again uncontrollably. Wolverine continues to refuse to attend class for Peter, but Peter screams that for all the crap he has been put through because of Wolverine, he needs to go to school now. Wolverine finally agrees, and Peter instructs him to just follow the kids. Wolverine says that Peter should really be more honest with his family - Peter replies, angrily, that Wolverine needs to get out of the house, and stop playing mutant tricks. At that moment, though, Peter accidentally uses the claws to shear off one of his fingers. Wolverine, in the Parker boy's body, says that he has no idea what's going on, but the phone gets cut off. Peter screams, crying out for a doctor, but then looks at his hand and watches as Wolverine's mutant healing factor kicks in and the finger grows back. May tells Wolverine to get to school. He grunts, and finally heads for the school.

Midtown High School - Wolverine, in Peter's body, stops to check out the high school cheerleaders with a perverted grin on his face. Mary-Jane arrives with Spider-Man's stuff, but can't get his attention as his is too busy staring. Wolverine asks why the girls are allowed to walk around like that. Wolverine continues to confuse Mary-Jane, as he didn't bring Peter's school books, but she gives him the Spider-Man costume. He takes one look at it and laughs.
Wolverine starts walking around campus, looking for his own body and the Parker boy within. A truant officer begins following him around, but Wolverine ducks him by using the Spider powers and clinging to a wall. However, Wolverine finds that he isn't good at it, and falls on the officer. He begins to hit the man, but Peter rushes in with Wolverine's body, and stops him. They blame each other for what has happened, and Wolverine asks Peter how he got his powers in the first place. Wolverine grabs his own hand and shouts at Peter for managing to cut off a finger. They argue about school for a while, when Peter accidentally pops a claw in front of Wolverine, causing the mutant to experience the Spider-sense. He shakes his head, asking why it buzzes so much, and they finally agree that Wolverine will take Peter's body to class and Pete will wait outside. Peter asks Wolverine politely not to ruin his life.

Wolverine goes upstairs, and the teacher looks at him sternly for coming to class late. He puts his hand up and says that he has to pee. The teacher says that the bathroom is for students who come to class on time. He gets up anyway and heads for the door, with the teacher and Mary-Jane staring at him. The teacher finally threatens to expel Peter, and Wolverine narrows Peter's eyes and sits down finally. Behind, Flash Thompson flicks his ear, and Wolverine turns around, giving Flash a crazed look.

Later, Peter still waits by a tree with Wolverine's body. He hears police sirens, and sees a drive-by shooting in progress. His sense of responsibility kicks in, and he pops the claws and jumps into action, unaware that his agility and Spider-sense no longer apply. He overshoots the van with the guns, which causes it to spin out and hit the police car. The van is then hurled into the air, where it lands on Wolverine's body.

Inside the school, the kids flock to the window to wath, while Wolverine sits in his desk with an angry look.

"Idiot kid."

Characters Involved: 



Aunt May Parker

Mary-Jane Watson
Flash Thompson and other students

Brian Michael Bendis

Mark Bagley

Story Notes: 

Spider-Man has gotten involved with the X-Men several before: originally he met Wolverine during Ultimate Team-Up #1-2 and ran into several X-Men in Ultimate Team-Up#12. He again met them during "Blockbuster" (Ultimate X-Men #34-39) and once during "Irresponsible" (Ultimate Spider-Man #40-45).

May decided that her and Peter needed to move after all the tragedy in their house in recent months - Ben Parker was shot to death there in Ultimate Spider-Man #4, while their houseguest Gwen Stacy was recently slaughtered by Carnage in Ultimate Spider-Man #63.

Spider-Man decided to give up his costume in Ultimate Spider-Man #65 after Gwen's death. He told Mary-Jane, which leads to her confusion over Wolverine's actions in Peter's body in this issue.

Issue Information: 
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