1st story:
(The colony of New York. October, 1760)
A man is running for his life nearby an old castle. As the guy runs, he fails to notice a stone lying on the ground and trips over it. He falls, and hurts his shoulder and shreds a part of his clothing. On that very moment, the man’s chaser catches up with him: a giant werewolf with very sharp teeth! The werewolf grabs the man by his ponytail and threatens to drop him off a cliff. Luckily, the man has a blade in his pocket. He uses it to cut off his ponytail, and safely dives into the waters below. The werewolf growls, almost as if it wants revenge.
(present day, New York)
Wolverine hangs out in a bar, where he listens to the same guy reading a chapter of his newest book. The entire club enjoys it and happily clap their hands, except for Logan. He can’t believe Kitty actually likes this stuff. As an autograph session begins, Logan approaches the poet and asks him to sign a book for Kitty. But he smells something suspicious. Logan grabs the man by his clothes, wanting to know how it could be “Duncan” knows so much about werewolves. Duncan claims he has been blessed with a generous muse. Logan smirks, but obviously doesn’t believe the tale.
Duncan signs the book for Kitty and takes off, thanking everyone for coming. Logan quickly follows Duncan outside, but he is already gone. Logan sniffs around, catching a familiar scent. Logan notices a figure jumping over some roofs and thinks it’s lucky he brought his “working clothes” with him. Logan quickly puts his X-Men uniform on and happily starts climbing a roof, ready for a tussle.
On the roof, Deadpool has an aim at Duncan, wondering how a book writer like Duncan can earn a million dollars like that. Wade gracefully jumps over some roofs, following the writer to his home, joking he’s in the wrong line of business and should start up writing books himself and thinks about stealing some of Duncan’s ideas.
At his home, Duncan tries to calm himself down, thinking that Logan was just another weird fan. He notices he forgot to turn on the alarm again and doesn’t like that. He thinks he spend entirely too much money on a home with wiring older than he is. Suddenly, an evil, but familiar sounding voice jokes that the trappings of man have spoiled Duncan. Duncan looks behind him, and freaks out when he recognizes the werewolf beast!
On Duncan’s roof, Deadpool is ready to jump in and opens the skylight. Suddenly, he gets punched in the face! Wade falls off the roof but manages to hold himself up on the edge of it. Wolverine sarcastically greets Deadpool, with Wade not please that Logan turned out in having become a lousy comedian now. It’s like talking to Bob Saget. Deadpool jumps back up and kicks Logan in his face. Logan angrily breaks a water pipe and starts smashing Wade’s face in, shouting that this is payback for what Wade did to Kitty a while ago.
Deadpool has no problem with apologizing for what he did to Kitty. He is ready to do it, but then Logan snikts his claws open, causing Wade to panic a bit. Wade quickly jumps at Logan, punching him down causing the two to fall through the roof. Wade shouts that he’s got a job to do. Logan thinks that must mean Wilson is supposed to kill the “Annie Rice” of werewolf books. Deadpool quickly throws his sword through Logan’s neck, causing him to fall back and bleed. Logan warns Wade to look behind him. Wade at first doesn’t want to believe that old trick, but does when he hears a loud growl behind him.
The werewolf lifts Deadpool high up in the sky and throws him against a wall. Wade jokes, thinking the werewolf and Wolverine must be related to another as they both have hairy backs. The werewolf rushes towards Logan wanting to finish him off next. Wolverine quickly pulls the sword of his chest and uses both his claws and Deadpool’s sword to hit the werewolf, realizing he and Duncan aren’t the same. But the sword brings no damage to the werewolf as it’s only made out of chrome and not silver, like Logan had hoped it would. Wolverine shouts at Deadpool that he’s going to kick the merc’s butt after this. That’s fine by Wade, who quickly runs away.
Wolverine follows the merc and goes to hide behind a thick wooden door. Wolverine wants to know what’s going on there. But Wade doesn’t know; he was just hired to kill the writer and wasn’t informed about any werewolves. Duncan steps forward suggesting he’ll explain things. Wade wants to kill his victim but Wolverine holds him back. Duncan reveals that the werewolf which is attacking him is part of his race. Ducan was a Lycanthrope, but a very long time ago he forsook his heritage to live among the human race. Ducan had hoped he was forgotten, but apparently was wrong. Wolverine suggests that Ducan transforms into his werewolf form and helps him out, but Ducan can’t, as he remains stuck in the middle of the transformation!
The werewolf catches up with Wolverine and Deadpool and is ready for round two. Logan snikts his claws open, joking he can take the guy as he sure isn’t a Wendigo. The werewolf is surprised that Dugan doesn’t seem to fight back. Wolverine and Deadpool go stand in front of Ducan, protecting him, with Logan shouting that the werewolf will have to go through them first before he can reach Duncan. That’s fine by the werewolf. He slams his big fists on the ground, causing a small earthquake and making Logan loose his balance.
Logan shouts at Deadpool to help him out. Wade thinks that’s fine, and suggests that the werewolf just takes Duncan so they can move on with their lives. Logan shouts at Wilson to just get Duncan into safety, and not to harm him or else he’ll have to deal with him. The werewolf defends he doesn’t want to fight Wolverine, but Duncan. Logan ignores that and slashes his claws through the werewolf, causing it to bleed. In his defense the werewolf uses his own claws, but only shreds Logan’s uniform a bit.
Meanwhile, Deadpool has brought Duncan to the upper living room. Duncan doesn’t think that leaving Deadpool’s “friend” Wolverine behind like that is such a good idea. Wade corrects that Logan isn’t his friend. And besides, they are getting Duncan to safety so he can stop whining.
Suddenly, the battle noises stop, making Deadpool think that the werewolf must have killed Wolverine. Which means he can kill Duncan now! Wade takes out his blade and jokes that with the feral mutant gone this means he can kill Duncan without his conscience being hurt.
Ducan start growling like a werewolf and sees several eyes appearing in the shadows behind them. On that very moment, the werewolf punches Wolverine through the roof! He runs towards Duncan, pleased he can finally finish him off. Duncan tries to warn the werewolf, Lycus, about the eyes but he refuses to believe it. Deadpool explains to Lycus that he too was hired to kill Duncan, so they are on the same side in a way.
Suddenly, green fog appears and several other werewolf-like people step forward. Lycus recognizes them as the Council! The leader of the Council explains to Lycus that they truly had hired Deadpool. Lycus gets confused. The Council reveals that in order not to draw any more attention to their race, they wanted a human to kill Duncan so it looked like a “human crime.” The Council also believes Lycus betrayed them. And if they hadn’t stopped him, they are certain Lycus would have done more damage than Duncan’s silly books. Lycus let his animal side obscure Deadpool and therefore has broken the law. The Council announces that Lycus’ punishment shall be to live like a true wolf from now and forever.
The Council points its attention to Duncan, telling him he has forsaken the wolf for the man and therefore must be destroyed. Wolverine snikts his claws back open and protects Duncan, getting the Council to think about it. They explain that Wolverine has bought Duncan time. They start fading away, explaining that dawn is breaking and that they’ve already spent enough time on this plane as it is. But they warn Duncan that, by the next full moon, Duncan better be far away from this place and life. And the Council wants Duncan to remember they have an eternity to haunt him.
Deadpool tries to stop the Council, begging for his money, but they ignore him and fade away completely. Wolverine smiles this sure was interesting and asks Duncan what he’s going to do next. Duncan explains he can’t live in the way of his tribe nor, as it seems, like an ordinary man. He realizes the Council will never stop pursuit. He thinks he’ll better go seek a quiet place, a remote town where he can simply be. He knows that sometimes, that is all any of them can hope for.
Deadpool walks over to Wolverine, thinking that with all this finally over with, they are even now. He wants to shake hands but, instead, Logan punches Wade in his face! Logan helps Wade up, joking that now they are even. They take goodbye from Duncan, and Logan smiles that, in order to prove there’re no hard feelings towards Wade, Logan will even let the merc but him a beer.
2nd story:
Wolverine is present at the annual super-hero poker night. He stares in front of him and notices Captain America, She-Hulk, the Thing and Nick Fury impatiently staring at him, wondering what Logan is going to do. Logan jokes that he’s the best there is at what he does, and that playing cards isn’t that. He snikts his claws out and angrily shreds them apart.
Getting up, he walks towards the fridge, asking anyone if they want a beer or something. Cap smiles, asking if Logan can bring him a ginger ale. Logan checks the fridge but there isn’t any beer left. He remembers Fury drank the last brew, asking Nick if he knows what that means. Fury smiles that he does, and tosses Logan the keys to his car, joking it means Logan can go fetch a new case.
Wolverine angrily storms out and heads to Fury’s flying SHIELD car. Logan isn’t happy to be inside it, as it makes him think he’s Marty McFly. A few moments later, Wolverine has got a few more beer packs, and parks Fury’s car again. As Logan tries to lock it, the alarm goes off and security wires try to trap Logan. He snikts his claws open in an attempt to free himself. As Logan fights the coils, he notices a young street punk approaching him, and runs away with his beer.
Once free, Logan quickly follows the punk into an alley demanding his beer back. The kid drops it, and Logan picks it up, joking at the kid to just stay away from it and everything will be fine. Suddenly, fog arises from a sewer and pushes the hatch open! Logan stares at it, and the fog drags him inside! Wolverine falls down into the sewer, and notices weird-looking monks floating in mid-air, meditating. Hand ninjas quickly rush into the room, thinking Logan is an intruder and start attacking him.
Wolverine quickly snikts his claws open, not wasting any time to defeat the many ninjas. They start to panic and think Logan fights like a Komodo Dragon. Logan angrily shouts that the ninjas don’t seem so tough anymore out of a sudden. He just wanted his six-pack and move on.
Suddenly, Logan hears a loud roar behind him. A giant dragon has materialized! The dragon tries to eat Logan, but he manages to hold the mouth of the dragon open long enough. He tries to explain to the dragon that this is going to hurt the dragon a whole lot more than it will him.
Logan snikts his claws through several body parts of the dragon, causing it pain and fall into the sewer water, dead. The weird fog appears again, and teleports all of the Hand ninjas, the dragon and the monks away, leaving Wolverine behind, alone. He climbs back up to the surface, grumbling wonder what’s going to be next. Galactus? He walks back to Fury’s car and flies back to the Baxter Building, where everyone has in the meantime fallen asleep.
Wolverine goes to sit on a couch and puts the TV on. The announcer mentions that the next movie is going to be a Japanese classic “Attack of the Dragon Ninjas!”
