All-New Doop #3

Issue Date: 
August 2014
Story Title: 
untitled
Staff: 

Peter Milligan (writer), David LaFuente (artist), Laura Allred (colorist), VC’s Clayton Cowles (letterer), Michael & Laura Allred (cover artists), Devin Lewis (assistant editor), Nick Lowe (editor), Axel Alonso (editor-in-chief), Joe Quesada (chief creative officer), Dan Buckley (publisher), Alan Fine (executive producer)

Brief Description: 

Doop takes older Kate Pryde to the Marginalia, where she reveals herself to be the shape-shifting Raze, who stabs Doop. However, Doop has called his old teammate the Anarchist for help. Raze threatens if Doop doesn’t keep quiet about his true identity, he will reveal a horrible secret about Doop’s mother to the world. Doop lets him go. The Anarchist later finds him in the dumps drunk on lemonade. The Anarchist gives him a pep talk and convinces him he has to face his fears. First, though, Doop kidnaps Iceman and Kitty and the two have an argument about being disappointed in each other. Doop gloats, convinced they are breaking up. Kitty confronts him about this and he admits that he knows she won’t marry him but he can’t stand seeing her waste her life. He returns Iceman and Kitty, steals some magic from Magik and uses it to conjure his mother.

Full Summary: 

Doop watches as Kate Pryde from the future berates Kitty and Rachel for letting young Jean and Scott get away. Suddenly, the two young women find Kate is gone and Doop, alone with Kate, finds she isn’t really future Kitty but the shape-shifting Raze.

Rachel figures maybe she is hiding somewhere, daring them to get away. That is just something sneaky future Kitty would do. She can’t blame her for how she turns out, Kitty remarks. Who can she blame? Rachel retorts. How does she end up like that? Kitty has no idea. Rachel feels Kitty is keeping something back. She is acting distant recently and all this weird talk about Bobby… Kitty sighs she wouldn’t believe it. She looks at the hole into which Doop disappeared. She is not sure she believes it herself.

In the Marginalia:
Raze recognizes Doop. His old man had a real thing for him. He stabs him. Get him back to reality or he’ll puncture him like a balloon. Green slime bursts from the wound and hits Raze in the face. Doop identifies him. How does he know that? Raze asks. Doop replies he has no idea. His mind is full of such information. For example, he knows what Richard Burton said to Liz Taylor on their wedding night. He said…

Smart-assed green monster! I’m going to tear you to pieces!” Raze shrieks. Close but not quiet, Doop points out.

Raze attacks and Doop dodges. He may be a smart-assed green monster but he’s their smart-assed green monster! a newcomer announces. It’s Tike Alicar aka the Anarchist. He tells Doop he heard the distress call. U-Go Girl would have come too but she’s tired. Raze tells him to back off. The Anarchist replies that he and Doop used to be teammates in X-Statix, so he can back of himself. He blasts Raze with chemical charges from his explosive sweat.

Doop and Tike fistbump. Doop thanks him and asks him to guard Raze, while he informs the X-Men about the impostors from the future. Tike is impressed he now speaks English.

As Doop is about to disappear, Raze shouts that, if Doop tells, Raze will tell the X-Men a terrible truth about Doop’s mother. Doop returns, curious. Raze warns him the whole world will learn it. Tike believes he is bluffing. Ain’t nothing he knows about Doop’s mother can be that bad, but Doop begins to sweat profusely. Tike doesn’t know his mother…

In reality, Kitty and Rachel discuss matters when “Kate” returns, telling them they’ll go nowhere. She was watching their pathetic escape attempts from the shadows. Kitty asks her if she doesn’t remember being Kitty. If she does remember, she’ll know how much Kitty is despising what she will turn into. How ashamed she is. Shame is a luxury they can no longer afford, “Kate” tells her.

The Marginalia:
In a broken down neighborhood with street names like Misery Mile and Shame Mansions, the Anarchist is looking for Doop and finally finds him lying drunk in a back alley, drunk on lemonade. Doop begs him not to let Raze get away with it. Helping Doop up, Tike asks what he is doing with himself. He’s been wondering about his mother’s secret, Doop admits. Tike tells him to confront her. Doop admits he’s scared. Tike tells him he has to stop running and face up to her, and orders him to repeat that. Doop finally shouts the sentence. Right on! Tike tells him. Now go find his mama.

Reality:
The Ice-Hulk attacks young Cyclops. While the others are distracted, Doop kidnaps adult Iceman to the Marginalia.

The Marginalia:
They are both falling in whiteness. What’s going on? Iceman bursts out. He was so going to take out the Ice-Hulk. He’s sure he was, Doop agrees. Iceman informs him if anyone does sarcasm here it’s him, and since when is Doop speaking English? Since he proposed marriage to Kitty, Doop informs him. No, she would have told him, Iceman bursts out. He would have done his famous Doop impersonation and-- He recalls the stinky ring. That was him? He’s been saving it for the right person, Doop reveals cheerfully.

Iceman angrily blasts him. Kitty is his girl! Kitty might have something to say about that, Doop points out and dodges the iceblast. Iceman finds himself alone, surrounded by masses of ice.

Reality:
Cyclops and Cyclops battle side by side. Rachel still muses about the future Kitty. She had one in her timeline, and she was nothing like that.

Suddenly, Doop grabs Kitty and pulls her into the Marginalia. She warns him that she will never marry him. Because she still clings to the tatters of her previous relationship, he states. This has nothing to do with Bobby! she replies.

The two of them and Bobby end up somewhere else. Bobby asks her about Doop’s proposal and Kitty dodges the question. So how did she react? he demands. How does he think? Kitty snaps. He has no idea right now. He’s got no idea what’s going on in her mind lately. Why should she tell him about a marriage proposal when she can’t even be bothered to inform him she’s broken rank and is siding with Jean and Scott?

Forcing them suddenly seemed wrong, Kitty explains. Not the point, he retorts. She should have told him what she was going to do. He should have supported her! she retorts. She should have trusted him, then maybe he would have! Maybe she can’t trust him, Kitty snaps. Maybe she should have stuck with Colossus, he retorts.

Doop gloats. Did he say something? Kitty demands. Just clearing his throat, he claims. He’s enjoying this, she shouts. He wants Bobby and her to break up! He simply wants to make her see they aren’t right for each other, he explains. She’d already reached that decision, Kitty snaps. She had? Bobby interjects. Kitty turns away. His works is done, Doop decides, grabs Iceman and takes him back to reality through a hole. Come back for her! Kitty shouts.

Back in reality:
Wolverine shouts for someone to control the Ice-Hulk. He won’t have this turn into a brawl. There are children present. Doop takes Iceman back, telling him his presence won’t be missed.

Doop returns for Kitty. She orders him to take her back and adds what he did was mean and unnecessary. She wants to go back to Utopia, but doesn’t trust her future self with Rachel. She tries to do it on her own by using her phasing power.  

Doop warns her that this needs practice. She might end up in the men’s urinal in the White House or worse. Angrily, she tells him none of his nasty tricks are going to work. No matter what happens with her and Bobby, she is not going to marry Doop.

He knows. This is not why he’s doing this. He has to face something and that will probably kill him. He couldn’t stand the idea of her wasting herself on Bobby. She is worth so much more. Mollified she asks what he has to face.

The Jean Grey School:
Doop sees Magik teleporting herself and the young Beast and Iceman and grabs a bit of her magic. Bergman! he exclaims, then begins his own Doopish magic: that which was joined to me, be joined to me again.

Energy flares and an angry voice demands why he teleported her here. She never wanted to see his silly face again. He’s a grown Doop. It’s about time he faced her, he replies bravely. What’s this? Finally, the imbecile learns English? a huge female angry Doop remarks. He replies to his mother that he needs to know the truth. So tell him!

Characters Involved: 

Doop
Iceman, Kitty Pryde, Rachel Grey, Wolverine (X-Men based at the Jean Grey School)
Cyclops, Magik (X-Men based at the New Xavier School)
Beast, Cyclops, Iceman, Marvel Girl (original X-Men)
Anarchist, U-Go-Girl (X-Statix)

Beast, Raze, Ice-Hulk, Xavier (future Brotherhood)

Mama Doop

Story Notes: 

The story takes place behind the scenes of the “Battle of the Atom” crossover.

Richard Burton was a famous stage and film actor. His personal life was for his marriage to his second wife, Elizabeth “Liz” Taylor, one of the most famous film actresses of the mid-20th century.

The “Bergman” to whom Doop refers is Ingmar Bergman, the famous Swedish director, writer and producer.

U-Go Girl and the Anarchist were both killed in X-Force (1st series) #128 and X-Statix #26. Nevertheless, both appeared in the miniseries X-Statix Present: Dead Girl, in which the eponymous character journeyed into the afterlife and interacted with them both. It was implied at the end of the series that both remained dead but journeyed to Heaven. It seems from their appearance here that they were resurrected at some point by their former teammate, Dead Girl.

Doopspeak:
Page three, panel 1: Huh?
Page 14, panel 4; Perfecto!
Page 18, panel 2: Magik!

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