nightmare…
Deadpool stands in a dark room in front of a huge mirror. Wade takes it off, and is glad that his former, scarred face is finally back after Loki cursed him into looking like Thom Cruz. Wade remembers how ridiculous he always acted when he lost his mask. He guesses he just couldn’t handle the shock and revulsion he would see on other people’s faces. Now, things have changed. He is familiar with the scars now and, even though his old friends owe him money, they never call him anymore. Wade walks back, but suddenly notices something. He stares back into the mirror, and makes the startling conclusion that he still looks like Thom Cruz! He smashes the mirror apart.
reality…
Wade finds himself on a spaceship, which is controlled by Electa, Malovick and Pyron. They hear Wade angrily smashing things in the ship and want to know what he thinks he is doing. Wade jokes he’s “smelling” away. He explains that he was having a nightmare, the kind which gets worse when you wake up. Electa reports to Houston that they are ready for take-off, and head into space. Wade takes off his helmet, and the observers at Houston are surprised to see Thom Cruz.
As they are in space, Wade thinks he ought to call Oprah when he gets back, and inform her that Barney put him in charge of this stupid mission, with students of his who are taking something like a final exam. Wade mentions to them that no matter what, he’ll flunk them and later on go have a nice dinner at Wendy’s. Wade remembers that they have to steal Baron Zemo’s death-ray gizmo before it burns up in re-entry. And after that, he knows that his aids will get their super-villain G.E.D. and he himself will get the promised 1.7 million dollars the Taskmaster originally promised Titania.
Deadpool’s apartment…
Titania and the Constrictor have hired Whiplash, who helps them get over things. Whiplash claims that Skeeter isn’t following him. Taking a file to prove his point, he mentions that he agrees with the fact that Titania has done a job or two, and now has too much money and that it feels like a signal flare waving in the feds. Skeeter agrees.
Whiplash believes that she will need multiple systems up and running to handle various income sources. He mentions that, if it were up to him, he would take his high-end robbery cash, bank the world domination attempt paychecks in platinum bricks in Oslo, and stuff just enough corporate hit cash under the floorboards to pay off the occasional judge or prison warden. And, he adds, since Titania and her husband Absorbo file jointly, he claims that there are some added deductions under the new E312 rule. Whiplash wants to know where Crusher is.
Constrictor believes they had a fight. Skeeter denies that, claiming she only wanted to have a little space for herself. Constrictor jokes that would make it a fight. Skeeter defends that it wasn’t, but will be if Frank doesn’t shut up. Frank also sarcastically thanks her for not helping him repair his cables. Whiplash tells him to go walk in the park. He also mentions that he loves what Titania has done with the place, but doesn’t understand the “Dead Lounge” area. Titania explains that was Wade’s idea. Constrictor defends that, with his cables restored, they might be thinking or re-naming the place. He decides to test them out on Hayden and grabs the poor salesman in it. He asks Whiplash for help.
Whiplash claims he can’t do that, because he is a super-villain like Constrictor and Titania are. He mentions he has to go now, as there is a sale at the food club and his wife has got a fistful of coupons. He tells them if his help is needed again, a call is all that it takes. As Whiplash has left, Constrictor asks Titania if she realizes he is going to kill them. She doesn’t think so, believing Whiplash to be a pussy cat. Frank wasn’t talking about Mark, he was talking about Deadpool. He thinks they’ve turned a corner.
Titania doesn’t think so. Perhaps they turned a bend at best. Frank disagrees. This definitely feels like a corner to him, something with a sharp edge. Titania knows that Deadpool knows that the Taskmaster’s mission is a trap because she paid him 500,000 dollars to walk into it. That’s exactly Frank’s point: he realizes that Wade is one of those guys who sees things in their own little warped way. He never understood guys like that. He knows for sure that Deadpool will come back, angrier than ever before, probably looking for revenge. Frank thinks they need to go to the next level of the plan.
space…
Wade and his companions arrive at Zemo’s orbital platform in under twenty minutes. The Houston airport notices and reports that their shuttle is 1,000 miles out of position. Electa doesn’t think so, joking that Houston has their mission and they’ve got their own. Pyron doesn’t like how big his spacesuit looks. Wade remarks that that’s because the suits they wear weren’t made for them, reminding Pyron that the real pilots are still tied up in the cargo bay. However, Wade does wonder if they turned on the air down in the bay (Wade isn’t aware that he didn’t do that, and the pilots are floating around). He suggests that they park this ship so they can move on.
Electa claims that it isn’t that simple, wondering if Wade slept through the briefing. Wade admits that. She explains they have to walk it. Wade doesn’t understand and asks Electa to wait… they have to walk in space? He reminds her that they are in orbit and, despite what people can see on Star Trek, things in orbit are moving, slung around the atmosphere at more than 500 miles per hour! It’s like stepping off the Concorde in mid-flight! Electa remarks that there is no gravity up the death-ray. She explains to Wade that to him, it will feel like standing still.
Wade jokes that everything feels like standing still to a Pizza Hut obsessed fat girl like Electa. He believes that maybe if he had her ballast he’d be less concerned. Electa explains that the death ray platform’s orbit has been decaying for years now. They have less than an hour before it burns up in the Earth’s atmosphere. She doesn’t care if Deadpool wants to stay in the shuttle, as she can radio him for the needed access codes. Wade agrees. Once Electa and the others have left, he floats to the cargo bay and opens it. He asks the pilots that when they got defeated by his companions if they saw them plant something on the shuttle, like a bomb or something.
He notices the tape around the pilot’s mouths and strips it off. The scared pilot thinks Wade came to rescue him and claims that there isn’t a bomb on board, at least he didn’t see one. Wade believes otherwise, claiming his interns are up to something the moment he laid eyes on them. In fact, he remembers it just like a flashback scene:
flashback scene…
Deadpool and the others are training. They get attacked by simulative SHIELD agents. While Deadpool opens fire, Electa reveals she can defend herself by shifting her mass so she can more easily maneuver in the weightless space they are fighting in. And she can also defend herself using her blasts. Malovick congratulates Electa on the fact she killed some SHIELD agents and tells Pyron to finish the job. Pyron releases a beam from his head, and disorients the remaining agents so Malovick can finish it using his super-strength.
Deadpool is angry and cuts the invisible wires, having had enough of it. An angry Taskmaster enters, again telling Deadpool even he told him a hundred times that invisible wires are expensive. The training session gets stopped, and the four depart to hijack their spaceship.
reality…
Electa asks Deadpool for the codes. He claims that will have to wait, as first, he would like to make a phone call. He calls home and the Constrictor, who was lurking around in Deadpool’s room, answers it. He jokes that he’ll take this call off from his rent since the call comes from space, and he realizes it’s Deadpool calling. Wade has nothing big to say, but he just wants to know if there’s new mail. Frank claims nothing big, just junk and magazine subscription possibilities. Wade wants them all send to him. Frank calls Wade an idiot, but he jokes he heard that remark before.
Skeeter overhears the conversation and wants to talk to Wade. He jokes that she’s got a fine job going on there. He also mentions that he’s taking Skeeter’s money, and double-crossing her because he hasn’t seen her naked yet. Hey, it’s what super-villains do. Skeeter angrily ends the conversation, telling the Constrictor that Deadpool must die. He agrees.
Deadpool goes back to Electa and gives her a disk. He doesn’t know what the disk is, but it seems important. While she installs it, Wade notices a computer and activates it. He notices that a phone is attached to it. He calls Frank again, and makes them hear a loud explosion! Wade mentions he was just kidding and ends the call, leaving a devastated Frank and Skeeter behind.
Electa wants to know if Wade is through, because in a matter of minute this platform will become a deep fryer. It’s time to wrap this up. Deadpool hits Electa and starts fighting her, claiming that the Taskmaster set them all up. Wade realizes that the Taskmaster knows that the universe would collapse on itself before he would ever let himself get whacked by Jerry Springer rejects like Electa and the others. But, he suggests that without killing the interns, they instead team-up and make the Taskmaster pay for what he has done.
The battle continues, but suddenly, a noise is heard. The stolen shuttle is being sent back to Earth. The interns realize Deadpool send the NASA pilots back home without them. And they’ve only got ten minutes to live! Deadpool starts to feel it, and the impact of space makes his body grow fatter. Deadpool escapes, and finds one of Zemo’s old escape pods. Electa tells Pyron to do his part. Pyron does, and hits Deadpool with his head-beam. Electa explains that the Taskmaster figured Wade would pull a stint like this, so he had her deactivate Wade’s pod immediately when they reached the platform. It looks like they past the Taskmaster’s academy doing this.
The platform separates in two pieces and sends Electa, Pyron and Malovick on their way home, but Wade is now alone. And thanks to Pyron’s beam, Wade’s mind has now been wiped!
(Guess they call this a cliffhanger…)
