Exiles (1st series) #68

Issue Date: 
October 2005
Story Title: 
Destroy all Monsters - conclusion

Tony Bedard (Writer), Jim Calafiore (Penciler), Mark McKenna (Inker), JC (Colorist), Dave Sharpe (Letterer), Sean Ryan (Assistant Editor), Nick Lowe (Associate Editor), Mike Marts (Editor), Joe Quesada (Editor in Chief), Dan Buckley (Publisher)

Brief Description: 

The Science Squad battles Fin Fang Foom in the Red Ronin, but the battle is quickly lost and Blink loses patience with Dr. Connors’ rudeness and attitude. She teleports her team and the Squad to safety as Red Ronin is ripped to shreds. She then teleports to Fin Fang Foom and introduces herself as his fairy sidekick. As his sidekick, she informs him of a threat to his rule by a being named Krakoa, which is just over the horizon. Fin Fang Foom flies off to kill Krakoa, but the island monster eats the dragon and then returns back to its dormant state. However, even after received the serum for Mimic from Connors, there is no response from Heather at the Panoptichron. In the meantime, Deadpool took Heather hostage. Beak has the Timebreakers release Mimic, who slowly beings to Mimic Deadpool. Deadpool has Heather release the still-alive female Hulk, though Iron Man and Angel are also alive. Mimic regains his health, but Hulk will have no part in this battle. She apprehends Deadpool and cuts a deal with Mimic. As a judge, she will put Deadpool on trial, so long as they return her home. Mimic agrees, so Hulk executes Deadpool, claming that he deserves it the most. The Exiles then send her home, but Mimic soon finds that copying Deadpool’s powers has disfigured his skin. The other Exiles are finally able to return, though Blink is put off by Mimic’s new appearance. However, they have little time to worry about that, as they decide it is time to return Beak home.

Full Summary: 

On Earth #3752, the giant Red Ronin engages in battle against Fin Fang Foom in Tokyo, Japan. Inside Red Ronin are the Science Squad and members of the Exiles. Blink asks Dr. Connors and Pym if their master plan is to sit inside this robot until Krakoa shows up. Pym asks Blink if she has a better idea. Connors, rather snottily, asks Blink if she and the Exiles have not caused enough trouble. Blink tells Pym that she can get more Intel on Fin Fang Foom and perhaps find out if it has a weakness. She needs them to patch her to Sabretooth.

Fin Fang Foom attacks Red Ronin, stating how humans have gotten cleverer since he last roamed this planet. However, nothing will withstand his might. Sabretooth receives Blink’s call and agrees to call Heather for more information.

In the Panoptichron, Heather and Beak watch the Red Ronin battle Fin Fang Foom. Heather receives Sabretooth’s transmission and tells him that they are going to get themselves killed. Sabretooth informs her that Krakoa is supposed to be fighting Fin Fang Foom, but instead it’s more interested in the Exiles. Now they are bait to lure Krakoa back to the dragon. Heather reminds Sabretooth that, if Connors had just gave them the healing serum, they would have been back instead of distracting Krakoa. Sabretooth tells Heather that they can’t dwell on that now, as they need information of Fin Fang Foom.

Heather checks her data and informs Sabretooth that, in hundreds of realities, only a few Fin Fang Foom’s have been sedated by herbs. Most laid waste to their Earth’s and none have ever been flat out defeated. She will try to get more information on the sleep-inducing herbs, but until then she requests that the heroes retreat towards Krakoa.

After Sabretooth ends the call, Heather calls Strange via intercom and asks him to return to the control room. She needs help with Chinese herbs and she bets he knows twice as much as her about it. However, Strange does not respond. Heather orders one of the worker bugs to retrieve Strange. The bug, addressing Heather as Exiles Casualty-Five, agrees. Annoyed, Heather tells the bug to stop calling her “casualty.” The bug heads to the door but, when it opens, Deadpool stands there with his gun ready. He shoots the bug in the head, and then spots Heather.

Deadpool recognizes Heather and threatens to blow her brains out if she tries to morph into Sasquatch. He then aims the gun at her, but Heather informs him that she cannot transform anymore. Deadpool asks her how long he has been out, and learns that it has been a few months. Heather then asks him how he is alive. Deadpool tells Heather that he has a healing factor that makes Wolverine look like Gandhi. She would have to blow him to pieces to keep him dead, but then adds that she shouldn’t get any ideas. Heather realizes that Stephen must have awoken Deadpool from stasis, and then realizes that the poor doctor must be hurt.

Deadpool, not realizing that Beak is around the bend, apologizes rather apathetically for killing her friend. However, he wants to know where the Timebroker is. He wants to shoot his brains out. Heather informs Deadpool that there is and never was a Timebroker. They are in charge now. Deadpool asks who “we” are and learns that the Exiles are in charge. In fact some of them are on a mission. Deadpool looks at the monitor of Red Ronin and Fin Fang Foom battling and is delighted. He then grabs Heather and orders her to revive the rest of Weapon X. If she gives him trouble he’ll kill her.

Beak, in the adjacent room, whispers at one of the Timebreakers and orders it to awaken Mimic. The Timebreaker begins to argue that it is risky, but Beak tells him to do it anyway.

Deadpool leads Heather down the hall and tells her that this place reminds him of a Swedish ice motel he blew up once. He bets the vodka here stinks, though. Heather informs Deadpool that if Strange is hurt, then reviving Deadpool’s teammates won’t be easy. Deadpool tells Heather that he won’t get blindsided by her lies like the last time they met on that Earth, where they had to kill that super-mutant kid. He knew there was trouble when them Exiles arrived. Sabretooth never shied from a mission, but when Blink arrived he turned into a pussycat. Next thing he knows Sabretooth and Blink are cutting a deal and Deadpool’s life is expendable. This time, Deadpool plans on throwing Blink and Sabretooth a welcome back party.

The two reach the gallery, and Heather is shocked to find Stephen dead. Deadpool, however, is confused to see Mimic lying on the floor motionless, and wonders what he is doing defrosted.

On Earth #3752, Red Ronin gets a good blow on Fin Fang Foom, but the monster is still not deterred. Pym informs Connors that their weapons system has failed. Connors asks if Ronin can still fly, but Blink doesn’t wait for the answer and calls Sabretooth to find out what Heather told him. Sabretooth, however, replies that Heather hasn’t called him back. Something has gone wrong as mission control. Trask begins to freak out as his Red Ronin gets a thrashing.

Fin Fang Room rips off one of Ronin’s legs and asks the humans to come out. Blink, fed up, teleports Pym and Connors out, telling them that it is time for plan b. Connors orders Blink to teleport him back into Red Ronin, but she refuses to as her boyfriend’s life depends on him. She orders the two men to wait in the forest while she retrieves the others.

In the Panoptichron, Deadpool tells Heather to quit wasting time on Mimic and to wake up his pals. Why is he out of the wall anyway? Heather does not know, but she knows that he will die if he stays like this. For all she knows he is already dead. She cannot tell when he is armored up. Deadpool takes the hand held out of the clutches of the bug he killed earlier when he killed Strange. He then hopes, for Heather’s sake, that she knows how to operate the controls. Heather tells Deadpool that she knows enough, and quickly learns that the only other Weapon X members with stable pulses right now are Iron Man, Angel, and the female Hulk. Deadpool tells her to wake up Hulk, as he does not know the other two. Heather tells Deadpool to wait a moment, as she must check to see if she can wake up Hulk without hurting her.

On Earth #3752, Fin Fang Foom rips off Red Ronin’s head. He then announces, as the giant robot falls, that when he finishes destroying the army of man he shall keep the robotic Red Ronin and force humanity to fill it each year with the blood of their children in a tribute to him. Below, Trask watches as his masterpiece is destroyed. Blink teleports back and is immediately met with hostility by Connors, who tells her that she just ruined their only chance to defeat Fin Fang Foom.

Tired of Connors and his whining, Blink bluntly tells him that they never had a chance. The Exiles saves the Science Squad when they first arrived and have been putting up with their attitude, but they shall no longer. She is going to settle this her way and he is going to be quiet. She then tells Sabretooth to keep the “heroes” safe. Sabretooth grins and agrees, but asks Blink where she is going.

Nearby, Fin Fang Foom holds the head of Red Ronin in his hands and wonders if he should place it on the gates to his palace to warn all those foolish enough to oppose him. Blink suddenly teleports atop the helmet and asks the dragon if he is referring to people like her. Shocked by the challenge, Fin Fang Foom asks the girl, calling her human, if she dares challenge him. Blink interrupts the dragon and tells him that he does like to say his name a lot…over and over. Fin Fang Foom asks if she dares mock Fin Fang Fo…er…him. However, Blink sarcastically tells him that she would never dare.

This sarcasm is lost on the dragon, so Blink continues on and asks him how many humans he knows that can pop out of thin air. Confused, Fin Fang Foom asks what she is, if she is not a human? Blink teleports onto the snout of the dragon and tells him that she is his fairy sidekick. Every dragon worth his salt has one. She is there to serve him. Shall she warn him of a threat to his greatness? Fin Fang Foom’s eyes follow in the direction that Blink points, as she tells him that Krakoa challenges him and if he squints he can see the monster over the horizon. Blink then teleports away.

Fin Fang Foom looks around and calls out for his fairy sidekick, wondering where she went. Screaming out “fairy sidekick” once more, the dragon decides that she served her purpose anyway, but for now this challenge must be answered. Krakoa’s doom approaches on leathern wings. So says…

“Fin Fang Foom,” chants the Exiles and Science Squad below, some with grins, others with embarrassed and shocked looks on their faces.

In the Panoptichron, Beak looks at the monitor as Sabretooth calls to Heather, asking why she isn’t responding. Beak tells the Timebreaker beside him to ignore Sabretooth. If they call the Exiles back, then Deadpool might hurt Heather. He then asks for an update of the Stasis Gallery. The Timebreaker informs Beak that Weapon-X Casualty Eight has been awakened. Beak realizes that Deadpool is waking up more bad guys, and then asks about Mimic’s condition. He learns that there is an energy surge in Mimic, which means his plan is working.

In the Gallery, the female Hulk rubs her head and tells Deadpool weakly that the last thing she remembered was being sucked into the Negative Zone. Deadpool informs her that she wound up there instead. It seems anyone taken out of the game, dead or alive, ends up there. Hulk, who towers over Heather, demands to know if there are others like her alive trapped in the gallery. Heather tells Hulk that she thinks so, but that does not settle well for the other woman. Hulk, angry, asks Heather if she is not the one who put her in there. Heather explains that the beings that set up the Exiles/Weapon X programs were responsible. Apparently, they keep everyone they recruit to fix realities they broke.

Deadpool, confused, asks if the bug people are the ones who messed up all the Earths. They then recruited others to fix their mess? Heather confirms Deadpool’s suspicion and tells him that the Timebroker was a lie and their realities aren’t broken. No one went home after fulfilling their mission, dead or alive. They ended up in the wall. Deadpool asks Hulk if she is ready to wake up the rest of their teammates and start calling the shots around there. If she can vouch for Iron Man and Angel, then they can be freed. Suddenly, Mimic moans, and Hulk asks what is wrong with him. The apathetic Deadpool states that the man is as good as dead.

Suddenly, Hulk asks Deadpool how long he has been standing around Mimic. Confused, Deadpool questions her question. The recovering Mimic tells Hulk that Deadpool has been around long enough. He then shifts back into his human form, though it causes much pain, but once he does his horribly sliced up body heals itself, thanks to Deadpool’s healing factor. Mimic felt it the moment Deadpool and he were released. Angered, Hulk calls Deadpool and idiot and reminds him why they call Cal the Mimic.

Deadpool tells Hulk that if Cal copied his powers then the joke is on him. Mimic, angered, armors up and tells Deadpool that he doubts that. He then asks Heather if they hurt her. Heather tells Mimic that she is fine, but Deadpool murdered Stephen Strange. Mimic pops his claws and tells Deadpool that he isn’t going to kill him, but he now knows how much of a beating the man can take and he plans on pushing him to that limit. Deadpool shoots at Mimic with his gun and tells Hulk to get ready to battle. Mimic knocks Deadpool out of the air with his optic blast.

Tired, Hulk grabs Deadpool out of the air by his foot and tells him that she is over this. As she holds Deadpool upside down, Hulk tells Mimic that she could probably beat him, but then what? She doesn’t care about Weapon X or alternate realities. She wants her life back. She knows the Exiles are good guys, so she will make them a deal. She will adjudicate Deadpool and they will send her home. Confused, Mimic asks Jennifer about her meaning. Hulk tells him that she used to be a judge. She is the closest thing to a legal system they will find for their dead doctor friend. Mimic agrees to the offer. Hulk then announces that by the power invested in her by the state of Texas, just is served. She then uses her mighty strength to slam Deadpool into the ground… shattering his insides to pieces beyond the repair of his healing factor.

Mimic and Heather stare in horror, as they were not expecting Hulk to kill Deadpool. Hulk, who holds Deadpool’s left leg in her hand, tells them that Deadpool deserved death, if not for Dr. Strange, but for the countless victims she watched him murder on Weapon X missions. Will they honor their deal now or are they in store for more pointless violence?

Sometime later at the Excursion Platform, Blink, Sabretooth and Morph return. Blink holds a vial in her hand and she gladly tells Heather and Beak that the mission is complete and Connors gave them the serum after she played monster matchmaker. Heather asks about the fate of Fin Fang Foom, and learns that the dragon was eaten alive by Krakoa, who turned into an army of flying monsters. Afterwards, Krakoa returned back into a dormant island. Did they miss anything around the Panoptichron?

Heather regretfully informs the group that Strange freed Deadpool from the Gallery, and was killed by him. Deadpool then took her hostage. Blink is shocked and then asks who beat Deadpool. Was it Beak? Beak informs her that Mimic defeated him. Surprised and happy, Blink realizes that Mimic could not fight unless he was healthy. She then asks if he is okay.

Mimic makes his presence known and tells Blink that “okay” is a relative term. All turn to see Mimic arrive, with his skin horribly disfigured, thanks to the fact that he mimicked Deadpool, who also had disfigured skin. Heather explains that Mimic copied Deadpool’s powers, but no one knew that this skin condition would be a side effect. Blink is a bit repulsed and wonders about the serum she brought.

Mimic approaches Blink, who stays at Sabretooth’s side, and tells her that he will first have to try and get rid of Deadpool’s powers. Then he can try to use the serum to clean up his complexion. Okay, says Blink quietly.

Heather announces that they have to be more careful with the Panoptichron technology. They almost ruined things on the monster world and they cost Stephen Strange his life. Mimic tells Heather that it is not her fault, but they cannot let fear paralyze them. They just sent the female Hulk home and they need to return the others in the stasis gallery back home, too. However, the next to go home should be Beak. He left a family behind and there is no good reason to keep him from his kids.

Characters Involved: 

Beak, Blink, Heather Hudson, Mimic, Morph, Sasquatch (Exiles)

Deadpool, female Hulk (former Weapon X)


Body of Stephen Strange

Earth #3752:

Dr. Curt Connors, Henry Pym, Tony Stark, Bolivar Trask (Science Squad)

Fin Fang Foom

Story Notes: 

Deadpool was “killed” in Exiles #13.

Deadpool never met Iron Man or Angel, as they were not on the team before his death. Iron Man was actually Deadpool’s replacement.

Beak was forced to join the Exiles in Exiles #48.

Issue Information: 

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